Thank You For Your Patience

I hear that a lot lately. My trip to LA this weekend involved a traffic delay getting to the airport (which made me miss my original flight), a luggage delay at the other end, and a plane delay on my return flight. It’s written on signs. It comes out of intercoms. It’s spoken by smiling airline staff.

Thank you for your patience.

I have no patience. Don’t thank me, because I don’t have it. I don’t. It’s like thanking someone for holding the door open who hasn’t, isn’t, and will never hold the door open.

They should thank us for holding in our rage. That would make a lot more sense.

Thank you for holding in your rage.

I like that a lot better.